New For the Holidays from the DHHG Decor Store

Need a very special holiday gift? The DHHG is offering a special on these wonderful bookends, straight from the government's surplus decor store.

These useful bookends were originally used by the government in Guantanamo Bay, and have recently been made available in large quantities as government surplus, which enables us to offer them to you for a wonderful low price!

The high quality fully functioning steel screws turn smoothly, ensuring an iron tight grip on whatever is placed between them. You wouldn't want to get your finger (or any other body party) caught in there! We have no idea what they were originally used for at GITMO, as there's really just a big prison there, and these things could really hurt someone if they were used the wrong way, but they sure had tons of them. But GITMO's loss is your gain, because now you can give them as fun and practical holiday gifts!

Don't forget to order a pair for yourself. Who wouldn't love to own a piece of genuine surplus government property?

Happy Thanksgiving

The DHHG wishes you and your family a very happy Thanksgiving.

Remember - drink and decorate safely!

DHHG Book of the Month

We here at the DHHG don't leave our jobs behind at quitting time. After an arduous day at work, when 2:45 finally rolls around, we'll often go home and watch HGTV. That's how dedicated we are. After that, we stay up late into the night reading shelter magazines. We do this for you, the decorating public. Books are a great source of inspiration, too. But with so many books out there it's often confusing. Should you believe Martha? Or does Christopher Lowell have the answers? Don't stress out. Why not let the DHHG pick your decorating books for you?

This month's must read:

Interior Desecrations, by James Lileks

Learn how to create beautiful rooms that express your own personality. You will learn about color coordination, object placement, and picking art work that really says something about you.



This book has earned the coveted DHHG "Gold Star." You can be assured this book is government-tested and government approved!

The History of Thanksgiving

Did you know that Thanksgiving is a holiday that owes its origins to our neighbors in Peru?

Aymara Indians living in the Andean Mountains of South America cultivated more than two hundred varieties of the potato. Every year they would hold the "Celebration de las Papas," where they would thank the Gods for providing an abundant crop. A small bird, often a turkey, was also sacrificed, and eaten with the potatoes.

When the Priests began imposing a tax on feast potatoes, clever peasants substituted the plentiful turkey as the main dish, relegating the potato to "side dish" status. The greedy Priests' plan backfired. Although many people still looked forward to the potatoes, most found they enjoyed the turkey just as well. Some people, of course, enjoyed equal amounts of turkey and side dishes. A few ate nothing but brussel sprouts. They were ostracized. When the Spanish Conquistadors brought the potato back to Europe (where it was grown in Switzerland, Germany, and Ireland), the "Celebration de las Papas" became anglicized to "Thanks for the Delicious Turkey and Side Dishes Day." Later, when the Pilgrims landed in the New World (America) they shortened it to "Thanksgiving," because they were just too busy. And that's how Thanksgiving became a holiday!

DHHG UNDER INVESTIGATION

Unfortunately, the rumors swirling around G-town have proven to be true. The DHHG has come under the scrutiny of a special prosecutor for alleged misdeeds. Secretary Kenneth H. Kenneth has issued a statement:

DHHG Denies Charges of Torture

Reminder: Please Remove Your Halloween Decor

According to The Department of Homeland Homes and Garden Decor Act, Article 6, Section 28.2(b): All Halloween-themed decorations ("Halloween decorations") shall be removed from private residences by the next Sunday after the occurrence of the Halloween holiday ("Halloween Holiday"). Halloween-themed decor includes, but is not limited to, cobwebs, black cats, broomsticks, pumpkins, pumpkin-like articles, witches, witches in trees, witches sticking out from windows, scary goblins, headless men, ghosts, ghostly figures, giant spiders, spiders dressed as ghosts, ghosts dressed as witches, witches dressed as pumpkins and/or pumpkins dressed as witches. Also included are tombstones of any shape or size.

If the Halloween holiday occurs on a Sunday, the decorations must be removed by the next Sunday after the occurrence of the holiday.

Failure to remove all Halloween-themed decorations may result in penalties to be determined by the amount and quality of the decorations occurring on or at the specific residence.

To view the approved schedule for Thanksgiving and Winter holiday decorations, please consult The Department of Homeland Homes and Gardens publication titled "When Can I Decorate In Compliance with the Law?"